Were it only that the Roles were Reversed...

Europe's much trumpeted Large Hadron Collider is having some rather serious sounding problems.

The collider was officially launched on September 10 when the first particle beam was successfully sent around the full circuit. However, it hit a major glitch last week when a mechanical failure triggered a helium leak and forced a shutdown for what was initially reported to be at least two months.
Now it looks like the investigation and repairs won't be finished in time to restart the LHC before CERN's obligatory winter maintenance period, pushing the restart date back to early spring 2009, officials said.

Faulty wiring, mechanical failures.... Were the roles reversed, and the apparatus in the United States, the news would come to be met with little other than abuse and bloviated extended discourse plausiting theories about American science descending into mediocrity, cultural this and that, and huge amounts of concern feigning sincerity. On the other hand, we only know that it Beagled because it was presented to the public with too much flair to otherwise conceal, especially given that they commissioned a vapidly atmospheric and flattering musical theme by Blur and carried as part of its' payload a creation of hack stunt-artist Damian Hirst.