The Aryan Science of Being Green

Because, as we all know, opinions and a good image are as good as someone’s actual actions.



The amazing übervessel is that way because Gore’s publicist SAYS SO, of course. But think of the magic! NO bio-fuel, NO solar panels, but quite the hearty air conditioning package, if you know what I’m saying... and somehow, by some miracle, it only needs to be fuelled ONCE a year, making it TWENTY times more efficient than a comparable stock motor pushing around a vainglorious gunboat of equal size!

How does he do it? Apart from simply declaring it so, he does it through VOLUME, VOLUME, VOLUME!!! And all this without those new-fangled things called a “jib” or a “mainsail”... It’s a MIRACLE!

Surely it must be the crystal drive or the pyramid power... something sereptisiously “liberated” when he was veeping. Otherwise try to replicate those amazing specs this way: when driving, engage in wild unsupportable hyperbole, and watch that milage shoot through the roof. Remember kids, you'll only have to gas up once a year!